Why I need my own DIY show, take 2

Everyone else is getting their own show. Vanilla Ice has his own show, for crying out loud. (Full disclosure- I’m actually a Vanilla Ice Project fan. He’s pretty entertaining.) I don’t know if DIY/HGTV ever troll WP looking for their next design show, but just in case, here’s my self-nomination for the liscensing of the hilarity that is about to ensue as my husband and I move into and renovate the house his grandfather had built in the mid 1970’s. We’re the third generation to live here! Added perk – the inlaws’ new house isn’t done yet so there is still plenty of time to get the details worked out on our show.

1) We’ll work cheap. I know money is number one in the television industry. You don’t even have to send us production people, just a couple video cameras (true DIY!) and some discount codes for flooring, tile, and paint. Seriously. Oh and can I get a design consultant’s Twitter handle?

2) We’re down-to-earth people. I’m pretty much over renovation shows that spend tens of thousands, go thousands over budget, and rip out entire rooms at the owners’ whim, and in this economy, I bet most of your viewers are too. I’m all for doing whatever to your house that fits your taste that you can afford, but how many people can really drop three months’ salary into a backsplash or find handmade clay tiles from Timbuktu? This is going to be the Everyman reno show, and will leave people empowered and energized for their next project, not wishing for a Crasher (and the accompanying magic bank account) to find them at Lowe’s.

3) We’re young and hip – aka marketable. We’re 25 year old kids surrounded by family – ripe for drama since there is going to be a ton of outside input into each of our plans, and a ton of pressure on us as we renovate the family farmhouse. We’re going to do it ourselves, with our spin on things. We’re also country, which is a *severely* underrepresented design demographic in your market. Barnwood can be locally sourced here!

4) My husband is the ultimate DIY’er. We might refer to professionals early in the planning stages, but the work will be all us. You haven’t seen creativity till you give a farmer an obstacle- HGTV will introduce millions of urban viewers to the concept of ‘southern engineering.’ It’ll be great for your sponsored teaching moments as we brainstorm affordable and unique design, MacGyver kits into working for us, and end up with a like-new home with old-home personality. With wall removal, paint, drywall, flooring, furniture, electrical, plumbing, tiling, soft furnishings, and a home bar, the opportunities are endless! Your viewers will be eagerly awaiting the next big thing out of the welding shop!

5) I have awesome taste. My Pinterest kinda says it all. Part modern, part rustic, all me. With a little money and a client list, I could have my own HGTV style show. My husband has a lot of fantastic ideas too, but we still clash over some elements of the home (he says lime green and navy “don’t jive.” Say whaaaat?) so our show will be full of compromise and creative problem solving. You can market it as wholesome family values rather than dramatizing marital spats a la Renovation Realities.

6) It’s a whole show, multi-season package. You see, we have a whole house to do. Three bedrooms, 2.5 bath, an awkward living room, kitchen/dining, laundry corner, garage with a future as a man cave, and a full outdoor living space (hot tub parties!). And like I said, we’re Everyman. I have an LLG position at a time-sensitive job that doesn’t give me tons of time off. My husband puts in 7 12 days on the farm and is trying to get his bulldozer service going. This means we don’t have a) tons of time to dedicate to projects or b) cashflow to do everything at once. Imagine the CG cutaways you can do as we re-stain the existing cabinets and talk about our 5 (or 10!) year plans! Isn’t that how most people are? They have a couple thousand they can spend on simple updates, and need shows that inspire them!

7) People always want to see behind the scenes footage. TV audiences love bloopers, like when someone paints themself into a corner, or when the materials are just a leeeetle too big for the truck bed. Women want to see me struggle to fit my jeans collection into my new closet. We’ll be living through our renovations, like many do, and can offer realtime hints and tricks – and entertainment. Don’t *you* wanna know what a houseful of 20-somethings is going to do one Saturday night when the bathrooms are gone? What will happen when something in the shop explodes and my farmer comes home and tries to not touch anything new or clean?? And, finally, can you say demo parties? (Maybe we should write a beer budget into our contract. Our neighbors work on the barter system.)

What I’m pitching to you is the real deal. Real people, real money, real problems, a real home for generations to come. We have family, an adorable yellow Lab, good friends, and an excuse to play with tractors. (Yes, my farmer will find a reason to use a 4020 on a house project.) You know, maybe I should pitch this show to Comedy Central…

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Unlikely Inspiration

Oh hey, I’ve been travelin’ on this road too long
Just tryin’ to find my way back home
But the old me’s dead and gone
Dead and gone
And oh hey, I’ve been travelin’ on this road too long
Just tryin’ to find my way back home
But the old me’s dead and gone
Dead and gone, dead and
-TI ‘Dead and Gone’

Happy Tuesday!

Christian Musings

I’m up early for once, and since I don’t want to get to work *too* early…

I’m a follower of Christ. You may not recognize it from my blog, or even in me in person, which is a terrible disservice to my Lord and Savior. Religion is one those things, though, that I believe is a personal choice. And I don’t think, at least in Oklahoma, that a person hasn’t CHOSEN a life of sin. Maybe in inner big cities, the idea, the tenets, the Bible, haven’t infiltrated to every man, woman, and child, but I’m pretty sure everyone around here has heard the Good News once or twice. Thus, having seen the ‘sign up sheet’, a life without Christ is a choice. And I’m all for choice. I also believe in Perfect Timing and Divine Intervention. You may tell me now that today is the perfect day to talk to someone, that God has allowed them to endure the world as it is so that I may gospel to them and learn and be a leader… Yeah yeah. If I feel so compelled, I may. But I’m also perfectly content to lead by example.

But see, to lead by example, I have to be identified as a leader. In order to say ‘be a Christian like this’ you have to say I’m a Christian. And that’s where my silence has meaning. If I live like a Christian but do not publicly label myself, I’m seen as a good person who has a bad day now and then (just ask my husband). But if I emphasize my religion, and live like a Christian, I could be seen as boastful, and if I have a bad day, I could be labeled as a hypocrite – neither of which serve His Purpose.

Is it not better, then, that I serve him anonymously? Until I get my feet under me, I mean. My religious upbringing was so erratic and bipolar, I have a taste of most popular sentiments (I adored Josh Harris’ no dating book! It’s a powerful idea, even if you don’t give up dating entirely!) but I don’t have firm habits. I feel His touch often – in sunsets, in newborn calves, in my husband’s embrace – but I don’t feel Him personally talking to me… Maybe that’s more fear of failure. But it’s also possible we just have a God who is waiting for the right moment ro make an impact. Or maybe I’m so stubborn, He’s taking a subtle route, switching my radio to The House and getting Lecrae stuck in my head,a waking me up early, causing a line from yesterday to speak so firmly to me that I feel moved to spend my half hour of free time telling you about it…

‘Cause if I do this by myself, I’m scared that I’ll succeed
And no longer trust in you, ’cause I only trust in me
– ‘Background’

Isn’t that so human? In bad times, we beg for help, but in good times, we pat ourselves on the back. A couple of people doing that to me just a couple of times would annoy the fire out of me and make me stop. Luckily, we have a benevolent God who believes in second chances. And third. And fourth. In seventy times seven chances, but who’s counting?

I’m not sure how to end this. This isn’t a vow to become fearless enough to publicly embrace ny faith, but more of a plan to try harder at the same thing? Feel free to give some input, share your stories if you feel moved, to show me some Scripture where I may be wrong or need some extra encouragement. I will not debate the aspects of my beliefs.

(But if you throw Timothy at me and tell me to jump around with the Holy Spirit, I’m going to politely decline. Fair warning.)

Happy Friday!!

Good News/Bad News

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This is why I’m glad I ran Monday… This was my running track last night. We really needed the moisture though, hopefully the wheat got a good drink before the snow melted today!

More good news:

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My new office decor is adorrrrrable! I just covered my bulletin boards with this awesome mod retro paisley. It’s hard to tell here, but it’s slate grey with muted colors, yellow and pink and turq.

Good news/bad news:
My ‘lean team’ (another work initiative!) won the random drawing in the holiday weight maintenance challenge. Our prizes came in yesterday – a iPod nano, a massage, and a Fit Bit Tracker. I’m excited to start tracking steps AND water AND fitness AND stairs AND sleep! And even better for ya’ll – my food! I’ll quit inundating ya’ll with my food diary. I’ll let you decide if that’s the good news or the bad news. Or both?

I’m still brainstorming our new house… The in-laws are getting closer on theirs, so it’s almost time to paint, drywall, and rearrange the old farmhouse. Anyone else been through that lately? Any suggestions? Pinterest is so tempting, but so impractical for a farm fam!

The worst news I have is that now I have to come up with real topics, now that I won’t be posting my food. Man. I’ll have to get the pics from my holiday crafting posted or something

Oh oh oh I’m registred for the spring 10K, the color run 5K, and the OSU Remember the Ten 5K! Run with me!

Food diary 12

Thursday
2waffles with plain (not vanilla – ick! Lesson learned) yogurt and sliced strawberries, juice
Protein bar
Half a chicken enchilada

Friday
Back to 2 waffles with pb and juice 🙂
McDouble and snack McFlurry
Cottage cheese
3 enchiladas and rice
Capt and Coke

Saturday
3 pieces of bacon and Strawberry Honey Bunches of Oats (with milk)
Cottage cheese
Cupcake brownie
Random cookie dough batter
Enchilada and a half

Sunday
Tortilla with turkey, bacon, spinach, and shredded cheese
Multigrain cheerios with milk

I’m definitely sure I missed something yesterday. But I’m glad to say I’m also definitely snacking less.

Food diary 11

Sunday night
Oh it was bad. Bbq wings, fried mac n cheese, pizza rolls, and more queso than I can stand to think about.

Monday
Waffles with pb, juice
Bbq chicken stuffed sandwich (and I was order #50 and got a free mini-loaf!!) and veggies w hummus.

Tuesday
Three slices of cinnamon apple bread (the free one!), two with pb, juice.
Fruit snacks
Subway Club
Roast, potatoes, carrots, a couple cookies
Ice cream

Wednesday
Griddlecake with sausage, juice
Other half of Subway Club
A hot dog, some cottage cheese, dry cereal, some more cinnamon bread, a couple bites of queso, and a few handfuls of dried cranberries. Too full for my pork chop….

Think water is still behind…

Food diary 10

I did have that cinnamon roll, and another one around lunchtime. Also had milk and cereal.

My stomach hurt for a while, but I finally got energy and appetite back and snacked on… I can’t remember now. Man…

Three beef enchiladas and rice.

Sunday
Protein bar, egg and cheese bagel, juice.

I’m remembering why I dilute my juice normally. :/ Ick. I sure do love orange-pineapple, though… This one might have mango, too.

Super Bowl party tonight!! Wish me luck resisting!

Iron Stomach

I did have that cinnamon roll, then some milk and Cherrios. And now my stomach kinda hurts. I’ve been thinking lately, maybe I don’t have the iron stomach I used to. I used to drink gallons of milk on my own, tons of cheese, yogurt and ice cream, and all of that awesomeness. I eat everything, but adore dairy. It just seems that dairy no longer likes me. Saturday last week, when we were at the state park, I went like a day and a half with only a little milk, and felt fine. Came back and went back to the cereal and ice cream and the icky tummy. Cheese on my sandwiches seems to be okay usually…

Does that sound like lactose problems? I did a short Google search, they say you can develop these problems over time. Or maybe it’s something else altogether…

Blah. Food is too much work.

Food diary 9

I also had half a mug of hot chocolate on Wednesday. Training called. :/

Thursday
2 leftover waffle quarters, pb, juice

Turkey sandwich with lots of spinach

Chicken fried chicken with gravy, salad, most of a baked potato, and most of a roll. I hurt all evening.

Friday
Other two waffle quarters, pb, juice

Salad, two slices pizza, and ice cream

Crescent roll with ground beef and cheese, lots of leftover meat

Saturday
About a cup of cottage cheese (the bottom of the carton) and burnt bits of my husband’s cinnamon rolls. I might eat a whole one in a minute.